Backyard Aquaponics
A place to discuss aquaponics

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la lalalala la la la la

Aqua,
While I have never enjoyed the experience of being a father, I can understand the grief. A year ago my mother went through a short but life ending course of strokes. For about a month she was in and out of a state of dementia, so there were many days when I would go see her at the hospital and she would not recognize me and believe that I was a demon sent to harm her. This was especially painful because she lived with me for the last several years of her life, and we had become very close. This Mother's Day was particularly hard for me, because I dwelt upon how she was last year, and not how she had been on all of the other Mother's Days of my life.
I hope that you and your missus can always remember your happiest days with your little darling, and the grotto/memorial gives you and her a place of quiet peace and rejuvenation.
Kevin

HI Kevin...
Thanks for that - MOTHER'S day here in Cairns was no joyous occasion for us either... We had nothing but joy from Cheyenne which is what makes her absence even worse - she had my heart tightly in her little hands...
I tinker on her memorial every few days now, but to be honest it just is too much most days to do anything at all new to it... need more time I guess....

Just hang in there, "they" say it gets easier with time. I don't know who the "they" are, but sometimes "they" don't have a clue.

today has been one of the worst since Cheyennes burial - a police officer came around first to our house, then to my work, to inform us that they are opening an inquest into Cheyenne's death! Both Natasha and I felt as if the bottom of our world had fallen out and , well, I could not even think straight now... Now we have to go through all of that stuff again, and have to live the day she died again and again - just when I thought we could maybe start pulling our lives back together...
I don't blame the police officer, he was just doing what he was instructed to do - its the coroner (some bloody magistrate) - do they ever think about how it will effect the families involved,,, how it will rip open sensitive wounds, while he goes home to his comfy, high priced home at the end of the day - leaving us to somehow pull ourselves together again...

damn beaurocrats . *frack* them all. Here if ya need AM. Stay strong mate

I am of the mind that the a-hole who has called for this has only his own agenda in mind... He cares not for how Natasha and I could fare.

AM, when is it going to be? Please let me know, I'll try to come up.

Sux big time AM.... like Mon's already said... stay strong and true mate....

Don't let them beat you down... and hey I'm all for you letting them know how you and your wife feel when the time comes..... tell it like it is brother.

That's another sucky part of it - they are yet to set a date... I did find out that they want to have 'good media coverage' of the whole show... which is another reason why I feel this coroner/magistrate is trying to further his own agenda and career

THey wont get us down, but they sure are hurting us and I resent that of them!

Fair bloody call AM

An inquest...?

Damn AM..... That sux soooo much......

AM- I am trying to draw a positive if it is at all possible.
I hear your pain and suggest two possible tracks of thought-
1/ To ensure we update our understanding of the danger(s) that children
frequent, ensuring where possible a safer environs policy.
2/ opportunity to conclude the grieving process.

Then the goodness will come to the surface and you can embrace with love the time you did have together

6 Stages of emotional grief in no particular order anger, guilt, bargaining, denial, resentment, and the most important acceptance.
I say this with love and thoughts of kindness and caring.

C1
always us living love

AM in my work we talk about the Coroner alot and sometimes have to change our work practice because of what he has written in his reports. I pray that this inquest is not one to try and attribute blame, but rather to make recommendations in an attempt to prevent these tragadies occuring again.

If that was what is was about then I would be kinda okay with it, but the police officer did indicate that they were seeking to see who was to blame - I dont want blame, I have been through the blame game... I just want to remember and love that which I DO have left of Cheyenne...
If I am to blame I accept it, if others are, I don't want to know... I loved her then, I love her now, that to me is all that matters as I have nothing else except for the love she showed me and what I showed her...